In Norway there’s a patronizing saying (really a question) to unpublished authors that really gets on my tits, e.g. "Har du en forfatterspire i magen?" Literally it translates to "Do you have the seed of a writer in you?" which sounds very much like a nasty request of a street prostitute. But anyway, it IS patronizing and it really pisses me off. It’s as if unpublished writers are children trying to write and completely failing to do so because they’ve yet to be published. Well, fuck off! I write better than most published pricks in Norway any fucking day. And let’s NOT make a list of all the brilliant all-time classics of the world, who never were considered for publishing, ’cause I don’t have all day. If you feel in any way like me, you should check out Truckin’. There are vacant spots for the summer issues and your submissions are most welcome! Pauly writes:
This issue marks the return of a couple of former contributors including the triumphant re-emergence of AlCantHang. Broseph eloquently weaves his story about a not-so-perfect night out. Dawn Summers shares a comedic tale about an unexpected flood in her Brooklyn apartment. Meanwhile, Drizz digs deeps and reflects upon the friendships in his life. My selection this month is a spinoff and an exploration into character from a previous Truckin’ story. And I decided to change things up a bit and add an old poem that Tenzin McGrupp wrote almost a decade ago.
Uncle Louie by Paul McGuire
He used to be full of life and love and generosity, but no more. These days, he was capable of saying horrendous things that made you feel like you were three inches tall. He had the madness of an angry blind dog…
State Line by AlCantHang
It has never once failed me when I yell “OY!” and look like I’m going to eat your next born. People generally shrink away even though I barely reach 5-foot-nothing. Not once in my life had it failed, that is, until the “old dude” took a fucking swing at my gourd…
If You’re Gonna Lose, Lose Big by Broseph
I was starring at their boobs and I got the idea of maybe trying some threesome action. It’s a tough bridge to cross, and I had no idea where to start. I decided to just start making out with Gwen and hoped that would work…
American Hero by Dawn Summers
The skies were just this shade of pitch black at nine in the morning. The rain was slamming against my windows. And the wind, oh the wind huffed and puffed and tried to blow my house down…
Self by Drizz
With a "normal" middle-income life that most Americans live grinding out work for the man and making enough scratch to satisfy the needs and wants, there’s hardly time to take a step back and enjoy this existence…
In Between Fighting Souls by Tenzin McGrupp
My quagmire of a life resembles
A wretched Fox sitcom,
A Shakespeare play,
A black and white Woody Allen film.
Except that Joey Buttafucco is the lead actor
And stands forty-five pounds overweight…