That’s right! I’ve only got six days left here in Cuba, before I go on to that plane and head homewards. How has it been?
You can’t run away from life anyway, even though that seems like the illusion at the moment sometimes, but in the end everything is just the same and contrasts contradict each other until upheaval. I’ve experienced what it is to be me in Cuba for three months, and I’ve learned a great deal of things about myself and about other people. I have, among other things, learned not to trust your feelings at all times – or in other words: not to trust yourself – because sometimes the situation fools your ass, and you’ll be the one to loose if you don’t have the guts to put it right again. I had the guts, and I’m content with that, but still there are yearnings in my soul..
(lighting up a cigarette)
I’ve filled a 150-page book with poems and drawings which really extracts the essence of my stay here. It provides for all kinds of reading when I look at it, and it amuses me at times to see how some things have developed and some things haven’t. In the end, all the changes stay the same, however.. I called it Raisons d’etre and I might post some of them up at poems.sigg3.net if I see it fit, but don’t wait for it.
I haven’t toured as much as I’d like, but because of the situation of being a student at the University of Havanna and having weekly hand-ins which are obligatory to perform, I haven’t had the necessary energy to pull it through. I like to not stress around like most other people do, I like to enjoy the moments in themselves, and not when looking back at a situation applying feelings to it that never really occoured. As you all should know by now, I appreciate what I consider reality – in all its forms, even though some of them are darker.
I have learned how fast life can be pulled away from you by surviving a robbery by chance itself, how much good food really makes life better, and how lucky I am to be a wealthy bastard even though I keep complaining that I am one. I have learned how propaganda works and how good it works, I have seen the power in masses of people and how easily these can be misled.
I have grown well too accustomed to the effect of good, Cuban ale (named Bucanero) which is why I’m staying sober tonight. There is this party going on presently for all the Norwegian students, but I chose not to attend, and I’m luckily not the only one. At the moment I’ve become really homesick, I yearn for a regular coffe even though it costs six times as much, I want my tobacco and I do not want to see another episode of Dismissed on MTV. I’m looking forward to getting away from this country even though I love its more fascinating sides, and all those adventures that I haven’t had the time to experience. Hence, I must come back some day. Life between stations, friends, that is what I’m talking about…
All in all I can say that I’m content, why should I not be? I haven’t visited the Museum of the Revolution but I have made a couple of really good friends for which I’m grateful. Ahora no tengo el tiempo para escribir mas, pero juro que voy a continuar esa vida cuando yo he dormido un poco. Nos vemos!