Happy Terrorist Day, everyone!

Today we celebrate Happy Terrorist Day to commemorate clever political tricks in order to explore ethically dubious international strategies, and general extortion of less developed nation states. Hooray!

For the last couple of days I’ve only been reading the history of Rome (Introduction to Roman History by A. Kamm), and what strikes me as their major strength is their strategic flexibility. When you can’t beat them, (steal and) marry their women! And if that doesn’t work, you can grant them 50% citizenship. Where the Greeks couldn’t overcome their own pride (an Athenian was born Athenian), the Romans allowed a few privileges to those they didn’t bother to stab to death. I think this could work great in the USA with regards to Mexican workers. Call them "20% American" and you avoid a lot of grief!

What is "half a citizenship" you ask?
No idea. Make them pay tax, but don’t hand out a passport. Win-win!

In local news, Norwegian forces are preparing to pull out of Afghanistan, calling the mission a complete success! Confused? I am not. In war, you must defeat the enemy. In a "tactical operation" you can terrorize the locals and leave whenever you want. Don’t come dragging with the Geneva conventions here, you red-cloth’d scallywags! This isn’t war! It’s simply an operation! We’ll leave as soon as someone friendly sits at the top who can secure a proper pipeline, okthxbai.

To celebrate Terrorist day you should re-activate your facebook account or create one that is fake, sport some anti-Semitic slogans, and declare your support for the criminally insane. Preferably on national newspaper’ websites. Cheers!

One thought on “Happy Terrorist Day, everyone!”

  1. Lalalalaala *fingers in ears* I can’t hear you over the Celine Dion playing.

    Damn, I almost got through the day without realizing it was 9/11. Thanks a lot.

    It is so true what you say, though, and I’m now depressed. Time for another overly sentimental pop song!

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