What the?! Snow?

Woke up this morning and all the world was white. I was kind of not in sync, still half-dreaming, waiting for my micro-wave coffee, and I stood there in my infamous bathrobe and looked at the white thinglings falling to the ground in the backyard. I was all like: "What the fcuk? What’s going on here?" I put on Tom Waits’ All the world is green from the Blood Money album, just hoping it would all go away.

It didn’t.

This makes crossing the street a life-threatening mission.
You see, here in Oslo, half the people can’t drive while the other half hasn’t changed their tires yet. Where I come from people can drive a car at the age of six. You have to. Everybody knows that if you can’t drive a car, how the hell are you going to kill a polarbear?
Ah, walking in the streets covered in white powder makes me think about them days in the autumn up North. Living above the polar circle, the light would be gone by now, and you would walk around in an immanent depression – which is very usual up there – hating the snow with all your guts since you knew in your heart that after school, after work, after having made your dinner and having done the dishes; you’d have four brilliant hours shuffing away that snow. All for nothing. ‘Cause the next day, another meter of snow would lie there. So don’t you come here an’ tell me it’s all beautiful! You know nothing! I was up there, man, up there in the snow!


So, I was waiting for the subway at Grønnland Subwaystation, pissing myself off about an advirtisment that said something about skin care. "The last part of the body to draw nutrition from the food you eat is your skin. That’s why you have to use Garnier Horseshit." Somehow I don’t believe eating that shit would make my skin any better. ‘Cause my skin is at its best!

Then I ran around at the University, trying to collect the last pieces of the mandatory articles prior to my next exam. But NOOO! Some smuck had just stolen the master copies, so now I have to request new ones etcetera ad infinitum.
And now it’s lunch. I bet they don’t have waffles today. What a horrible day.

4 thoughts on “What the?! Snow?

  1. Ahh, killing polarbears:
    -Look mommy! A polarbear!
    -Good, at least we got something to eat!

    “And in the morning, I’m making waffles!” (Guess what movie)

  2. The cat got my tongue.. I know that one.. I really do..
    I’s not the French chick in Pulp Fiction. I’s a merrier film alltogether. Hmmm..

  3. Speaking of cat got your tongue, where’s this from:
    “What’s the matter boy, tent got your tongue? Ha ha, tent got your tongue. [CENSORED] write it down for [MAGAZINE]” I can give you only one hint: velour.

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