Genie gets your facts straight on Intelligence Design and Creationism

I was hunting for Bigfoot on youtube, when Google suggested a video by Eugenie Scott from the National Center for Science Education (USA being the nation in question) called Genie takes on Bigfoot–and wins!. It’s a good presentation if you’re already into the cryptozoology scene. Otherwise, read about BFRO and the Patty/Gimlin film, for starters.

Anyway, it turns out that the NCSE is a main force in the battle of young American minds, fighting against the teaching of quote unquote "alternative theories" (i.e. creationism) in schools, and I ended up watching 3-4 hours of her presentations. Eugenie "Genie" C.Scott, Ph.D., is an inspiring scientist and her presentations are clear and balanced. Below are three videos (around 55 minutes each) that I really enjoyed:

Creationism: Still crazy after all these years

This talk from the Atheist Alliance International Convention in 2009 gives a great rundown of the history of "Creation Science" up until today.

Getting evolution right: Tips for writers

This video that is aimed at journalists targets the traps you should avoid and common misconceptions about evolutionary biology and, notably, why we should talk about evolutionary biology as opposed to ‘Darwinism’.

In the Beginning: Explanations from Science and Religion

The last video featuring Eugenie C. Scott, Francisco Ayala, and Denis Lamoureux (the two latter being devout Christians); talks about why evolutionary biology and Christian faith is compatible and can even be an inspiration for worship. It is really good, and underlines the fact that you can be a Christian and a proponent of evolution at the same time. This video is particularly nice, because even though I am an atheist, I cannot stand the recent poisonous debates by Richard Dawkins and the like, who strategically confuses opinions with facts. I am an atheist, but it is unscientific to state that my opinion (which I do believe is scientifically founded) is a scientific fact. You cannot prove that God does not exist scientifically, end of story. Trust me, I’m a philosopher.

Dawkins’ ad hominem attacks on Creationists as being stupid is a very bad strategy, and plays right into the hand of the creationist politics of displaying both evolutionary biology or ‘Darwinism’ and Creation pseudo-science as two opposing theories in a field — the "alternative theory" approach — when the former is a core idea spanning several fields of science with volumes of intersubjectively accessible evidence and demonstrable proofs, and the latter is a political strategy to allow teaching that God created everything _as-is_ in exactly 6 Earth days. Stop referring people to Dawkins and point them to instead, unless you want this ridiculous debate to go on.

Almost nearly exactly like Iceland in 2010!

This January, like two months ago, we received a letter from the city informing us about the chimney sweeper expected at our address the 13th of March, advising us to close the fireplaces, cover them up, and that we’d be responsible for any flame-incurred death(s) if we lit a fire at the time in question. Now, between that letter and THE TWO MONTHS that came and went there’s been shit happening, like life, and we sort of forgot. Until yesterday afternoon when I entered the livingroom to find a black fire place and a fine layer of soot EVERYWHERE.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust DUST!

It’s like EVERYWHERE. Check out the illustrating photograph on the article submission guideline above. You can see the whiteness turn into a dull grey at the corner where the paper was not covered. It doesn’t look like much, in fact it’s nearly invisible, but put your palm on any surface and it’ll come up BLACK!

So after the raging anger and tearful lamenting was ceremonially finished, we had to get to work cleaning the place up. In fact, I’ve dedicated 80% of today to do it. As I was vacuuming the backs of 900 books in my library, it hit me that this is what it must have felt like in Iceland during the 2010 eruption, and promptly stated my hypothesis in Lady C’s general direction;

– This is EXACTLY like it must have been in Iceland 2010!
– Yes. Except for the amount of it. I lived next to a volcano in South America.
– You had eruptions there?
– Like, behind the house. We’d get a foot of ash on everything!
– Oh.. Well, except for the amount, this must be exactly like Iceland in 2010!
– And this only came from the chimneys, not through windows and ventilation, the air..
– Yes, of course, except for that.
– And it doesn’t fall from the skies, killing your livestock, foodstock, cars..
– Well, apart from that, naturally.
– Only to destroy your entire livelihood and 500 year old heritage.
– Oh, yes
– And then there’s no fear for your life in case it turns out it’s a super volcano
– ….
– ….
– But EXCEPT for the amount, the very local spread of the ashes, the fact that no livestock was injured (dog’s doing alright), and the apartment building itself is in no danger of collapsing and ignoring the lack of possibilities for a super volcano erupting, this must be EXACTLY like it was in Iceland in 2010, right?
– Right.
– That’s what I thought too!
– *sigh*

New Year Resolutions

It’s the Post-Apocalyptic Year of 2013, Christmas is finally over, and normal life returns. How am I? I’m Bachelor of Philosophy, fat and fartin’… Here, lemme explain!

More than a year ago, me and Lady C quit smoking. That’s right. I didn’t blog about it because I was unsure how the outcome would look like. In fact, without someone to quit at my side, it probably wouldn’t have worked. Anyway. When you quit smoking, you start gorging. Here I followed sound advice; I drank plenty of water and ate a lot of carrots. After a while I had to quit, though, because my skin was turning into a carrotish hue. I also ate a lot of chewing gum, a bad habit I haven’t kicked yet.

Anyway. I will never be as slender as I was back when I was smoking. I only ate a couple of meals a day, and instead just starved, filling my hunger with cigarettes. I understand completely why super models smoke. It’s excellent! But I never smoked as a way to keep my weight in check. It was for the sole reason of smoking that I smoked (akin to, I believe, alcoholics). Since then I’m more of a rounded number. Anyway.

Last year or the year before that, my mother (on my mother’s side) and her brother (on my mother’s side) had a stroke. My mum had a Japanese kind of stroke, but it was still very similar to a regular American Dream type of stroke. Anyway, since I’m related to both of them, and their father (on my mother’s side) died of a stroke, my doctor told me I was all set for the early onset of DEATH.

This started a very shameful chapter of my life, that I won’t detail here. Suffice to say, that I go to the gym undercover. Because I go to one of those cheapskate gyms, where the huge weightlifters either laugh or wink at you. But we have come to an arrangement. They don’t talk to me, I don’t talk to them. We exchange knowing glances. Nuff said.

For half a year I went to the gym 3 days every week, just doing regular healthy stuff there for about an hour, including stretching. I learned to stretch back in my Tae Kwon-Do career. Nobody else stretches, perhaps its out of fashion, but like I said, there is an arrangement.

Today I returned to the gym some 4-5 months since my last visit, and I intend to return on Wednesday. Nothing new, except the taste of blood in my mouth. Good thing I didn’t postpone it any further. Afterwards, just for the heck of it, I wanted to see how much I weighed. To my great surprise (!) I had the exact same weight as I did when I was a regular. But I feel more chubby, especially now right after Christmas. All that lovely pork and chocolate bits for the coffee. Mmmmm..

Anyway. What’s happened is that the muscles I had built before the summer has become flubber around the waist. If I keep at it for another 6 months, then I betcha I have the exact same weight, but look better. So for me, going to the gym is not about weightloss, but about staying alive and the redistribution of wealth- I mean weight. Bodily socialism!

Enough about me. Let’s talk nicotine!

As I said, I quit smoking. But for some reason, during Spring 2012, I found that I could use snus as a reward for having done my homework. What’s snus? I’m glad you asked! It’s pure nicotine and other shit, that’s formed into a ball, and put under your lip. Think of it as smearing your upper lip with tobacco. It’s wonderful. Also, as a bonus, you will forget that it’s even there! 100% nicotine addiction comin’ straight up. It’s so bad, that my brother Koew has BEGUN SMOKING AGAIN in order to cut down on the snus.

I’m not going that route, however, because I have tasty, tasty nicotine chewing gum.


Problem is, the taste of snus is really strong (and minty, if you prefer that taste) so to match that, I started with 4mg chewing gums tasting of "Exotic Fruit", which is another name for mint, apparently. 4 milligrams is really a lot, and today I find that I am more addicted to the actual chewing gum than I am to snus, and I even sometimes use snus just to cut down on the gum! This is strongly recommended against with the health problems (on my mother’s side) mentioned earlier.

Anyway, another side-effect with so much nicotine, is that it really relaxes your body. It relaxes all of your body. Including the voluntary musculature surrounding Uranus. In other words; flatulence occurs. Sometimes I blame the dog, but with Lady C it’s different. She’s a nurse. Nurses know their shit. So when flatulence occurs, there are explanations of how this is really necessary in order to SAVE ME FROM A TERRIBLE DEATH. Needless to say, it has its advantages too. I’m always the funny guy at parties ("Hey, do you have a lighter?") and last night me and Lady C had an entire conversation where I didn’t even have to open my mouth.

Turd and last, I have to get new glasses. I don’t have any money, I’m a student with a temp job at an ISP, but my 5-year old glasses are literally falling apart. So today I did an eye check to see if anything had changed. Ha, I still knew all the letters by heart! Do you get that? That you want to give the right answer to the pretty lady? Did I get that right? Really? omg omg omg is there a prize?! You are so vulnerable sitting there, chin and forehead stuck to a medieval-evil type of interrogation device, and the lady going Which is the best one of this:

blurry photo

*FLIP* …and this?

blurry photo

And you don’t know what to say, but there must be an extra-life or something, so you ask "Can I have them again, please?" not knowing whether this gives you negative points in that little score-book she’s hiding from you. Right, she says. What’s the best one of this:

blurry photo

*FLIP* …and this?

blurry photo

You can’t take a wild guess because YOU’LL BE WEARING THESE $$$ GLASSES, so you try to improvise, saying "They’re both kinda blurry", because you can’t ask for another re-run. She sighs. You know that you’ve let her down terribly, and you suspect that the next four images are the ones you’ve already seen and now you must remember what you said the last time. IT IS HELL.

Having been through that ordeal, I was taken to the showroom to find a new frame for the glasses. My old TAGHEUER glasses were really cool and I was looking for something like them. I told that to the pretty lady, and she said: That was AGES ago! So much has happened since then! To which I thoughtlessly replied: People have different heads nowadays..? She didn’t laugh.

Today’s glasses are more Harry-Potterish. Big, bold frames in light materials. I am not convinced. I’d look like a retro-70’s television presenter. On the other hand, I wasn’t convinced back in 2007 either, and then I ended up becoming quite the sex symbol (at least to some few a couple of people). I decided to take a couple of days to think it over. She was happy to see me go. And in the meantime, I’m staring in the face of every person on the street to see what kind of eyewear they’re using.

Anyway, apart from the prospect of dying and death unless I suffer the humiliation of going to the gym and getting a nice buff hamster cheek from all the chewin’ + flatulence occurs, I’m all good! That is also among my New Year Resolutions. Stop being good, become excellent! So, now it’s your turn. What are your New Year Resolutions and how are your bodily functions doing and do you need new glasses? I have some Tag-Heuer glasses for you here, quite a bargain! Get it all out there. Put it on the web! Read the disclaimer and have a great 2013!

Why Socialism Isn't Wrong

Encountering an American that is pro-socialism means that you have either lost your way in hippy-alley or found a true Communist. It is always with a bit of wary that socialism is discussed, and it is always dismissed at the end of the debate, often as being less free. I want to show why socialism isn’t wrong.

First of all we must all agree on two things: 1. We are all human beings and 2. Socialism is not communism.

Why the former?
Well, as a member of the species we all need a group of things in order to survive; oxygen, water, shelter, food, perhaps clothing, security from internal or external violence (police and defence) and from cradle to grave you will need to be taken care of from time to time (childhood, injury, old age).

A Socialist State provides these necessary services from the outset. They are paid for by the entire community as taxes on income, wealth, property (and many, many more usually). In my country, before becoming a full-time student, I paid some 50% of my income in taxes, which to the American mind sounds a lot like robbery. Why should the state get half of what I earned through my sweat?

It is because I get the returns in double; 1) I get the necessities or the guarantee of the necessities (I don’t need a hospital full-time, thankfully, but when I do I can just show up) and 2) I am relieved of the hassle, getting more time to walk my dog and read books, and other worthwhile things.

In a Capitalist state you will still need the same things as I do in order to survive, you are still a human being, but you, your family or perhaps no one (if you are left on your own) will have to provide. You get to keep a greater amount of your income, paying for say, police, defence and paved roads; and in return you have to spend the time outside your working hours making sure that you have a good enough ensurance for health and home, which may be worthwhile to some, but I do believe you may have other things you’d rather spend your time on earth doing. In addition, the insurance may still come and bite you in the butt because of an unknown “pre-existing condition”, bankruptcy of the company and other things you cannot control.

It is proven that economically, health services in the Capitalist state costs more than in the Socialist state; in addition it is evidently not guaranteed and it is not better. So much is proven.

In a Capitalist state, then, you are much better off if your family already has a lot of resources. And conversely, you are much worse off if your family has little resources. If you in are born disabled or cannot work due to injury, the burden is put on those close to you (if any). You better get rich or die tryin’.

In which of these societies are you more free?
Is it the one in which where necessities are provided for and you can do what you want, or the one in which the necessities are not provided for and you can do what you want (but will have to provide for necessities too)? Is it the one in which your individuality is guaranteed by the state, meaning that you can do it all on your own if you want to, or the one in which you may have individuality if you are born rich or become rich? Is it the one in which everyone is equal as individuals or the one in which nobility still thrives?

The argument usually turns here with point 2. Equating Socialism and Communism.

This statement is false. Both the Socialist state and the Capitalist state as sketched above can exist in a state of democracy, for instance, the Scandinavian countries Norway and Sweden, and the United States of America. (Whether the latter actually IS a democracy, having but 2 political parties, is a different matter.)

State Socialism just means that you recognize that human beings are social beings (we want to help each other by nature). It does not mean what State Communism mean, e.g. DDR or USSR, in which the Marxist agenda is taken literally and the many are ruled by the few. Both Socialism and Capitalism as Democracies have guarantees against Communism (or totalitarian regimes in general). So equating Socialism with Communism is like saying Capitalism is Anarchy.

Then the argument says: But Socialist states are more prone to being taken over by Communist totalitarians. Again, this proves difficult in a democracy; however, the ideas of Socialism and the ideas of Marxism are related in recognizing humans not as individuals only, but as (individuals) born into a pre-existing community, without which humanity would disappear. Because unlike some animals, human beings are 100% dependent on other human beings from birth. Then at adulthood they may have times of greater vulnerability. The “Socialist doctrine” simply acknowledges that fact, and provides for a state in which the necessities are taken care of by the state, so that you do not have to rely on luck for survival — as in either being born into a rich family or staying healthy for long enough to get rich..

Furthermore, who do you think have the strongest incentive to monitor and control their citizens? The state run by citizens to provide for its citizens or the state run by the richest to create more riches for the richest?

I am as much against State Communism as I am against other types of Dictatorships.

Americans have two things working against them with regards to socialism: I. The Philosophy of the Frontier and II. Capitalist propaganda (that served its function during the War as creating a clear Enemy, and later as fuelling the fear of Socialism to ensure that the powerful stay powerful). Today the latter is known as consumerism.

With regards to the Philosophy of the Frontier; it may be time to recognize that the Earth is not some empty land we must exploit as much as possible before we die. This Philosophy never had any truth, but it did absolutely keep those frontiers alive a hundred years ago, and as such had a use. The same philosophy was probably rampant in Norway also, when the glaciers smelted, and the agriculturalists pressed out and assimilated the hunter-gathererers. However: Those days are over. With regards to propaganda: See for yourself. The truth is apparent to anyone who dare seek it.

Unfortunately, in debates, many Socialists will say that Capitalists are stupid, or that Capitalism is stupid. This is true, in terms of being an ignorant way to go about your business; why pay more for the same necessities that you already need anyway? It is always taken as an affront, but should be taken as: “We are sorry you are being screwed. That is stupid.”

Because Capitalism itself has a horrible fact working against it: Perpetual growth is a lie. The Earth is round. And sadly , the citizens and not the rulers, of the Capitalist state, are the ones who will have to pay. I promise we will do our best to help you out when the time comes, socialists at heart and that.

Happy Terrorist Day, Norway!

Today, Norwegians celebrate the national Terrorist Day, in remembrance of the huge one-man operation conducted by a medically insane crusader in order to protect the white race supremacy from the ongoing Muslim sneak-attack. To wit, by executing some 90 innocent people in the Labour Party summer camp and setting off a huge bomb downtown that almost got my half brother… go figure.

I am not up for creating a memorial day, because so many or too many Norwegians secretly agree with the fucked-up world views of the accused. He represents a deep-founded ignorance and societal incompetence, fear of Islam and some kind of undefined racism that seem to permeate Western Civilization. All over the place I hear people touting it was a terrible act, which it was, and then adding but he does have a point. No, he doesn’t. Don’t be a complete idiot, go out there and fucking check the facts. Where’s your sense of criticism? Fact-checking? You have a duty to learn the truth. And by that I DON’T MEAN FUCKING YOUTUBE. In fact, that kind of infomercials is likely a big part of the problem.

We’ve just recently gone through the trial, which has not come to a conclusion yet, but the story thus far is that the prosecution goes for criminal insanity. It has been something of a circus, with a lot of confusion around insanity in the medical versus the judicial sense. The latter is what’s at stake here, and requires that the perpetrator was suffering immediate delusions at the time of the deeds. I think the prosecutor had a weak case, but they didn’t have much of a choice because there was significant doubt due to differing opinions among the experts.

So, I’ve got this story all up in my throat, like vomit, knowing that regardless of what was said in the days after 22nd of June 2011, it’s gonna get political. It’s so fucking sad. Think about all the dead, and all they left behind. Staying at home today, it’s for the dead. I don’t have to celebrate Norwegian society today, it was what brought forth this madness in the first place.

Getting a Sony PS3 for next to nothing…

Lady C’s mother bought a Sony TV earlier this year, and with it she received a coupon saying she could get a Sony Playstation 3 with Uncharted 3 for only 550 NOK (around $90 USD), which is a 75% discount in our high-cost economy. She was going to throw it away, but we got it instead, and so started the long journey towards an unsatisfied customer.

First, we had to register our e-mail address in the Sony online campaign. Then we needed a "complete printout" of the online registration form, the EAN bar-code on the TV packaging, and the SN of the TV itself, as well as a copy of the receipt itself. All of this we had to send down to a special address in France.
Let me add that we don’t have a photocopier nor a printer at home, so I had to take a photo of the receipt, edit it in the GIMP, send all of that stuff up to Uni and print it out there using my precious printing quota.. The day I finally had the spare time to walk down to the actual physical post office, wait in line and send it, was a sunny, hopeful day. Alright, a little bit cumbersome, but at least we get the PS3 for a great price, right?

After a long wait until the campaign had reached its official end, we received the e-mail offer. I acted upon it as soon as I had enough money to spare, paid the money online and received a receipt. W00T!11!

At least that’s what Sony Store had us believe. After a very long time I received an e-mail telling us that they had run out of stock, and was waiting for resupply. Shit happens, right? Okay, no biggie.

Then finally, we got the order confirmation and third-party delivery tracking ID. I immediately searched up the ID on their online tracker, but received a FILE NOT FOUND. Alright, be patient, wait a few days.. Then I searched again, but to no avail. What a shitty website, I thought, and called their customer support. I just wanted to get an ETA, how hard could it be? Apparently, very hard. Because the delivery guys had received numerous calls for non-existent packages, packages just like mine. I e-mailed Sony Store again, only to receive a "Please rate our service" e-mail in reply.. Thanks!

About a week and a half later I receive a PRIVATE phone call from an unlisted number. Since I was at work I couldn’t answer, and since it was PRIVATE I couldn’t call back. Must be a secret admirer, so many of those calling these days. No biggie. But then a few days later — also at work — I received another mysterious phone call. This time I dropped everything I had in my hands and answered the phone. It was an angry immigrant talking very fast;

– HELLO, This is sonycustomersupportIonlycalled to
– Hello?
– HELLO! Wearesorryforthedelay.
– Okay
– We just wanted to know whether you’d still like your product?
– Oh, is this Sony?
– YES!
– Whether I’d still like the PS3 I ordered like 6 months ago?
– YES!
– No need to shout.. Yes, I’d still like it. Why?
– Okay, errors bindun, just needtoaddanotherorderhereanditshouldbeaway in A SHORT TIME!
– Okay thanks!
– BYE *click*

Five minutes later I received a brand new order confirmation for another PS3. But no shipment confirmation or ETA to be found… Great job, Sony!

We haven’t even began using their device or their services, and I already feel abused and disgruntled. I’m having a bitter taste about the offer, and I’m beginning to question whether I’d like to contribute more to their empire. It’s alright to fuck up, Sony, but at least own up to it. We just acted on your damn offer. When the PS3 finally arrives, we’ll prolly play a few games and sell it for a profit. Hell yeah.

Poor again…

I’m poor again! I’ve got 45,02 NOK that must last until Thursday. Yay. Staying at home with beer from the cellar this weekend, listening to music on Compact Disc that I’ve already paid for. Just as well. Must hand in written exam by noon on Monday. Meh.

Teach a monkey to write…

I stumbled onto a link on a blog I read which said: "Top 10 Most Influential People to Follow on Twitter", and I immediately thought: «It will be a list of douchebags, compiled by a – or more douchebags, for the sake of douchebaggery.» And believe me when I say, that I was right. A Top 10 Most Influental people to follow on Twitter would be Obama (actually present in the article), Putin, Jesus (his account is rather dead, but his followers make a lot of noise) and the Prophet Muhammad, those guys in charge of US foreign policy, the World Bank, G20 and allies, South-East Asia, and some more. No actors, no television faces, no cruft. Not even me. But then I’m not on Twitter. I’m on! Yay!

.. I just realized my thoughts are apparently so important that I put them in quotes. «No, you didn’t.» Oh, shut it.

So, yesterday I began working on my first exam, which is just great because: a) Deadline is noon, Monday b) I have a fever and c) tomorrow’s the national holiday of Norway. I should have started Sunday, but I wasn’t feeling well. Monday I was even worse. Yesterday I was dead, but reading curriculum, and today I actually started writing.

German. Meta. Grammar.

That’s right. Meta grammar. Of German grammar. As if the regular kind was not enough. You can just hear Xzibit coming in his pants: "Yo dawg! I heard you like grammar, so I put some grammar on yo grammar so you can boggle while you struggle dawg!" (Xzibit) As if I didn’t have enough to do, I decided now would be a great time to move my T61 from regular Debian to pimped-up #! Linux (also Debian), using a worn-out NTFS formatted external USB 2.0 drive to move my 70 gigs of pr0n. Can you say Click-of-death?

I’ve got my German Thesaurus (heh, I wrote Theosaurus, which would be like a religious dinosaur — from Germany) for LibreOffice up, so I’m good to go. I should be reading right now, I’ve got some unperz√∂nlichen Passivs to tackle, but I thought about blogging something about something that I can’t remember any longer. Like my aunt recently said: "There is no such thing as multitasking." I’m half-asleep, drooling, and my thoughts keep interrupting me. Here’s a good time to log off, dial down, or whatever you hip kids say these days. GET OFF MY LAWN! I’m a sick man. Sick man.

To the Possibly Gay Guy at the Gym: Fuck Off

Having spent most of the day in bed and learning German verbs at the library, I decided to work out a little at the local gym. As you probably didn’t know, I try to go to the gym for about an hour 3 times a week in order to stay in shape. I have to, because my life style would otherwise render me a Fat Bastard in very little time. In fact, one could argue that it already has. But I would beg to differ!


The gym that I go to is fully automatic and therefore — and most importantly — the cheapest. I don’t want to pay a fortune to work out. After all, I’m doing the one doing all the work, right? Cheap also means that the clientele is varied, both in origin and numbers, and unfortunately though entertainingly a lot of people have no clue as to how to train efficiently, healthily and even safely. I’ve seen Thai kids literally harm each other because they don’t know any better.. but anyway.

There’s this annoying guy from East/Central Europe, I gather, who always jump onto the elliptic machines when I’m there. And then he starts just running like a fucking maniac.. and it annoys the shit outta me.

Okay okay, let me tell you how this works.

The Elliptic machines are like a bike that you stand on and that you have to move with your hands and feet. They are motion-powered, so after you step on it the screen lights up and you can choose your work-out method. This is where everyone else seems to totally ignore the technology and just try to act normal.
I’m the IT guy, however, so I work out that there’s a RESISTANCE setting 1-10, that I put to 4, and a count-down timer that I set to 20 minutes. There are all sorts of resistance-variation programs going all the way from 1 to 10 to 1 again over the course of 15 minutes, but I usually stay on the manual straight pain as the doctor prescribed. The immovable handles in steel measures your pulse if you hold both hands there for a little while. I usually do 10 minutes forward, 2 minutes reverse (which is really exhausting), and 8 minutes forward without breaks with a pulse of 140-175.

While I’m doing this, the other guy is just running along so fast that you can hear that the machine is being slowly but thoroughly worn-out. Why? The grown man’s running as fast as he can with no resistance.

But that’s not all.

While I’m taking it slow and steady, pushing but saving energy and watching television, he keeps looking over at me with this stupid fucking grin on his face. He doesn’t say anything, but he’s all like: "Hey, look at me! I’m fucking owning this work-out thing. My health is 100%! And you? Sorry dude, you’re shit. Give it up, man, give it up!" .. For the entire 20 minutes. Every time I go there!

Sometimes you just want to hit’em over the head like people did way back when. Remember that? *Bom* Okay, I did a mistake, I won’t do it again. Done.

Lady C suggested that he’s what the venerable Karl Pilkington would call ‘a little gay feller’. I’m not sure about that. Maybe you have to be homosexual to work out in Post-Soviet Russia, I dunno, but just in case that is the case I’m completely ignoring everyone else around me. I understand that they may be allowed to exist in order to foot the bill for the gym, but that’s about it. You don’t look at people, never talk to them, and you don’t make a fucking pass. You’re at the gym!

I mean. Seriously.
I can understand that people would like a piece of this little cupcake; especially when I’m running on the treadmill, all red-faced, panting and farting, and sweating so hard that my man tits are lactating.. I’m like your regular male model!

But how in fucking Hamburg is running on the elliptic machines at full speed and with no resistance whatsoever supposed to impress a fucking sex machine such as myself?!

No, I think Lady C is wrong, it can’t be gayness. I think he’s just an asshole, regardless of sexual preference. And it all boils down to evolution. This guy’s had his chance, he didn’t make it into the genepool, and now he’s just waiting for the gymnastic apparatus to end his life of misery. As it will the day that he slips, and his body is caught in the cold steel of the Elliptic machines, and torn to pieces.. Anyway.. A man can dream.

I should've been in class now

Only the students at the Faculty of Theology drink more coffee than we do at the Faculty of Better thinking but ours does alas not receive the divine blessing, and as such double-serves as a liquid laxative.

That does not entail less coffee, only sore bum.

We all have our little ways to maintain, and mine is to seek refuge in the single WCs at the Faculty of Linguistics, that are never in use and always clean. I don’t know why but many Asians go there learning English (in Norway, go figure). Asian schoolgirls don’t poop.

They also have motion detectors that regulate the light-saving. Today I learned that it is possible to sit long enough reading Slashdot on the cell for the sensors to deem you a fixed object.

It raised an existential problem, that was greatly underlined when the lights refused to go back on from within the WC. With pants around the ankles I fumbled for the handle only to expose myself to a class of Anime characters. "Oh, fuck."
Wonder how long etiquette dictates I should avoid the bathrooms for my daily meditation.. The scientific faculties’ have no comprehension of the refined art of toiletry, and force men of fine culture, such as myself, to relieve my bowels in the vicinity of common folk.